Marilyn's Mussings

My mother has been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. While the diagnosis is new, it has become evident to me that we have been going down this path for many years. The doctors finally told us what we refused to see. The first symptoms appeared not long after my daddy and brother died in November of 2003. I have spent the years since explaining away her behavior. She spent those same years covering her increasing inabilities. My frustration was only exceeded by her own. The diagnoses came when I could no longer offer excuses and she could no longer cover. I have entered a new kind of grief with the realization that she will never be better. But in church this morning, I experienced hope. Mother reached for the pew Bible and began looking for Psalm 23 with the rest of the congregation. I did not offer to help as previous attempts had embarrassed her but I watched while she was in Psalms, then not, then back again. She could not find the scripture before time to read. My heart ached.